


Normalcy: A Hogwarts Snapshot

by groaninlynch



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-19
Updated: 2016-02-19
Packaged: 2018-05-21 14:39:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6055270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/groaninlynch/pseuds/groaninlynch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus wants to spend a nice afternoon outside after his exams. He stumbles upon Sirius.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Normalcy: A Hogwarts Snapshot

**Author's Note:**

> i dont even remember writing this i just happened to find it in my writing folder and like... it was already done so im just gonna post it lmao. the working title was, evidently, "remus is a normal boy and sirius loves him dearly"
> 
> disclaimer: i have no idea about hogwarts test-testing timelines like when do they even take NEWTs? idk! whoops! feel free to correct my total lack of knowledge in harry potter lore, and ill edit the fic accordingly.

It was a fine summer afternoon the day following the end of exams, and Remus Lupin was planning to spend it quietly. It was his final year at Hogwarts and he had thusly been subjected to the NEWTs. They had been grueling and stressful, but he came out of them feeling overall satisfied, and definitely deserving in a relaxing day to unwind. It was certainly off to a lazy start; he had slept in much later than usual since he had no classes, and just barely made the end of breakfast, where he had lingered with some of his friends before heading to the school library.

Remus was doing his best not to let his mind wander to the tests he had just taken — he tended to obsess in the uncertainty of his results before they were officially released — so he had decided to spend the afternoon sitting outside reading a book. A simple solution, but effective. He checked out a book from the library, exchanged light conversation with the librarian, then stepped out into the glaring sun.

The sky was pristine blue and cloudless, but a gentle breeze swept over the grounds, cooling the air to a pleasant temperature. Students from all four Houses milled around, sitting in the grass chatting or playing games. Some wandered down to the lake, which glittered brightly in the afternoon sun, visiting with the school's friendly giant squid. Remus struck out across the grounds, in search of a secluded patch where he could read his book unbothered.

He walked idly, enjoying the feel of the wind in his hair, the sun on his neck. It was times like these, out in the broad light of day, where he felt almost as if he were normal. As if how he did on his NEWTs were really his biggest, and only, problem. He usually tried not to indulge such thoughts because he really could not afford to forget himself — for the sake of those around him as well as his own sanity. . . .

But at that moment, strolling under an endless blue sky, he allowed himself to believe he was carefree. He was a normal, seventeen-year-old wizard, about to graduate from school, who had his whole future ahead of him. A future full of possibilities, his for the taking, uninhibited. He was well. He was free. He was not dangerous.

The moment passed.

Remus sighed softly, resigned but still generally content, and continued ambling across the grass toward a copse of trees. He had the vague idea of finding a nice tree with lots of shade to sit beneath when he spotted a rather large lump laying in the grass. It was sprawled beneath a huge oak, and did not appear to be moving. 

But Remus knew that lump. He would recognize that lump anywhere, having spent seven years sharing a room with it.

"All right, Sirius?" Remus said pleasantly once he got close enough. Sirius had his robes pulled over himself to form a sort of cocooning blanket, and Remus saw that leaves had fallen to rest on them, suggesting Sirius had been laying there for quite some time. Thinking of it, Remus realized he hadn't seen Sirius at breakfast — Sirius had probably finished eating some time before Remus had found himself down to the Great Hall, and mozied on out to take a post-meal nap outside. Even when he was human, Sirius acted very much like a dog would.

The robes began to shift, and Sirius' head slowly emerged, like a turtle peeking out from its shell. His hair, which was a disaster at the best of times, was in complete disarray and had bits of grass sticking out of it. Remus didn't bother fighting back a fond smile; and once Sirius blinked the world into focus, a sleepy sort of grin spread over his own face.

"Good afternoon, my dear Moony," Sirius rasped softly, his voice still caught from sleep. He sat up, fluffing out his robes and clearing his throat. "What brings you out here?"

Remus walked over and settled down beside Sirius, back pressing against the trunk of the oak tree. "Just wanted to enjoy the weather," he said.

"And are you?" Sirius asked.

"Am I what?"

"Enjoying the weather."

"Oh." Remus smiled. "Yes, I am. And you seemed to be, yourself," he added, nudging Sirius' shoulder with his own. He didn't move away, and they leaned against each other.

"Nothing beats a nap in the shade after a filling breakfast, Moony," Sirius told him in a matter-of-fact way. 

Remus laughed. "How very canine of you."

It was Sirius who nudged a shoulder now. "Dogs are an intelligent sort when it comes to naps. I'd never presume to know more than them." Remus snorted at this, but said nothing. 

They sat together quietly for a while. It was nothing short of perfectly pleasant, and Remus could feel that sensation of normality creeping up inside of him. Remus Lupin, seventeen-years-old, basking in the beauty of a post-exam afternoon with one of his best friends in the world, with nary a worry to be seen past that. What an ideal. . . .

This reminded him of the book in his hands, which he opened. He got several pages in before he became aware of Sirius trying to sneak a peek over his shoulder. With a bemused smile, Remus turned the book slightly so Sirius could read along.

Not a minute later, Sirius gave a scoff. "'Destiny was too potent, and her immutable laws had decreed my utter and terrible destruction,'" he quoted from the book. "What have you got your nose in?"

"Same thing you've got yours in," Remus couldn't resist replying, since Sirius insisted on being included. Remus smiled when Sirius scoffed again. Marking his page with a finger, Remus closed the book to show the front cover. It was a simple design — dark and leatherbound, with the title and author's name embossed in gold, which Remus read aloud: "Frankenstein by Mary Shelley. She's a famous Muggle author from the 1800s. We talked about it in Muggle Studies last term, and I thought it sounded interesting."

"'Sounded interesting.'" Sirius rolled his eyes before taking the book out of Remus' hands, careful to keep Remus' place finger-marked as he flipped through the pages. "Has anyone ever told you you're a bit of a nerd?"

"Only a bit?"

After a few moments passed where Remus watched him turn through the book and read passages here or there, Sirius looked up from his inspection, meeting Remus' eyes. His expression was strangely serious, almost imploring. Remus felt his smile fade. He asked, "What's the matter?" 

"Tell me why you thought it sounded interesting," Sirius said. 

Remus tried not to fidget under Sirius' scrutiny. "What's not interesting about Muggle books?" he replied evasively. He wished dearly for the normalcy he felt only minutes ago.

"Remus."

It was often easy to forget that, underneath the reckless pranks and easygoing attitude, Sirius Black was a sharp-minded and clever person who knew Remus all too well. There was no fooling him. 

Remus sighed and dropped his gaze, speaking quietly: "It's a story about the creation of a monster." He paused, chancing a glance up at Sirius, who was staring steadily back. He looked back down. "He's evidently very self-aware and spends the book struggling with. . . .with people's perception of him."

He didn't want to say anything more, so he fell quiet, eyes fixed on the summery emerald grass. The silence stretched between them, the only sounds being the leaves rustling in the wind and the distant cries of joy from students playing around. Remus felt himself going pink, from embarrassment at his revelation and frustration at being put on the spot. He was considering getting up and walking away, leaving the dratted book with Sirius to deal with, when he heard a soft thumping. His curiosity getting the best of him, Remus looked up.

He had been afraid to find pity in Sirius' eyes, but instead, Remus saw that he was smiling, wide and bright in his usual way. The thumping sound was coming from Sirius using a hand to pat the ground between his own legs, which were spread apart. Frankenstein was being held, page still marked, in his other hand.

"What are you doing?" Remus asked, a little lost.

Sirius kept patting the ground and smiling, now quirking his eyebrows in an encouraging sort of way. Suddenly, Remus understood.

"Sirius, really?" he said flatly. Sirius waggled his eyebrows again. Remus hesitated; considered; shook his head; sighed and muttered, "Really?" again; then at last gave in and crawled over Sirius' leg to settle down in his lap. Sirius immediately wrapped the arm not attached to the book around Remus' chest, pulling him back into Sirius' torso. After some adjustment, he was snugged up comfortably with his head resting on Sirius' shoulder, hands folded in his own lap.

Sirius gave a loud sigh of contentment, as though life could not get better than having Remus sitting within the confines of his arms. When he spoke, Remus felt as much as heard the deep timbre of his voice: "Shall I read to you, Moony?" 

Remus breathed a laugh. "Go on then, Padfoot," he said. The book came to rest on top of Remus' folded hands. Sirius cracked it open, slid his finger down the page to find where he had left off, and began to read. He kept his voice low and soft and at an impossibly slow cadence, as though he were trying to lull a child to sleep. Remus could hardly find it in himself to be offended at that thought, for he found his eyelids slipping closed. The gentle rumble of Sirius' voice and the caressing breeze smoothed Remus into a doze, and he felt well, and safe, and at total ease. 

When he woke, the first thing he registered was the sound of jaunty laughs floating down on the wind; other students were still outside, so he must not have slept for long. Remus felt a hand running through his hair, in a repetitive slow journey from his forehead to the back of his skull, in an almost mindless fashion like it had been going on for some time, and he remembered quite suddenly he was sitting in Sirius' lap. His face was pressed into the slope between Sirius' shoulder and neck. When he opened an eye, Remus saw Frankenstein lying in the grass, a leaf sticking out of it to mark the page.

He was about to say something when Sirius pressed his nose to Remus' hair. After a moment, Remus felt a gentle pressure on the crown of his head which was unmistakably a kiss. Then he heard Sirius whisper, "I love you, Remus John Lupin." 

Remus had no idea if Sirius knew he was awake or not, so he opted to play like he was asleep for a little while longer. Sirius resumed petting Remus' hair, pressing his cheek to Remus' head. Sirius sighed, deep and melancholic. "I would follow you everywhere, if you'd let me," he mumbled.

His heart was thudding hard against his ribcage, but still Remus kept silent and unmoving. How long he ought to pretend to sleep, he had no idea; he was afraid of hearing more of Sirius' muttered confessions, which he clearly was not supposed to know about. But he was beginning to itch from the pressure of being absolutely still, and it was going to drive him mad. . . .

"I know you're awake, Moony," Sirius said calmly, and Remus nearly jumped out of his skin. Instead, he merely allowed himself to lift his head up and meet Sirius' eyes, which looked unwaveringly back at him. 

"You snore when you're asleep," Sirius informed him, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. His hand was still in Remus' hair, though no longer petting.

For a long moment, they simply looked at one another, both wanting to know what the other could possibly say in light of such things. Finally, it was Remus who spoke, hesitantly asking, "Did you mean that?"

"Every word," was the immediate reply, which again caused Remus to lose his words. This was fine, however, because it was Sirius' turn to pose a nervous question: "Are you alright?"

"That depends," Remus answered truthfully, thinking of all the ways he was not alright, nor ever would be; but upon seeing the vulnerable expression that flickered across Sirius' face, Remus knew instantly that in this case, the answer was an absolute, undoubted, "Yes."

The hand in Remus' hair slipped down to join with the one already on his waist. Sirius gave him a great squeeze of a hug, forcing a whole lot of air and a laugh out of Remus. Then Sirius brought both of his hands up to Remus' face, looking at him in that very serious way that he rarely ever did but had now twice in one afternoon, and he said quite plainly, "You are not a monster."

Remus flushed deep red instantaneously, and wanted to look away, but couldn't, as Sirius had him trapped in the confines of his warm palms. He was forced to hold Sirius' determined gaze.

"You believe me, don't you?" Sirius said imploringly, and Remus wanted so badly to reply Of course!, simply because it was Sirius Black telling him and he knew Sirius would never (intentionally) lead him astray. 

But that would be going against the word of everything he had ever read, had ever heard, about him and his kind, since he was a small child until now. . . .

"Don't you?" Sirius repeated, searching Remus' face. 

Remus took a breath and considered. The weight of the world’s opinions on his nature would always shackle his feet, that was no doubt. . . . However, Sirius — and James and Peter — had worked hard trying to fashion something of a key to those binds over their years of friendship, which they needn’t have done at all, and Remus wondered if perhaps they were not alone in their kindness and understanding. . . .

Finally, he said slowly, but honestly, "I want to.”

Sirius' face relaxed a little, apparently satisfied. Then his expression grew anxious again, and Remus was about to ask what's wrong now, when Sirius' eyes flicked to Remus' mouth and his throat dried up completely. He had just enough semblance of mind left to meet Sirius halfway when he began to lean in, and just like that, he was kissing Sirius Black, and it was of course altogether wonderful and frightening and exhilarating, as most things are with Sirius. 

When they parted, Sirius heaved a sigh perhaps even more deeply contented than when he had convinced Remus to cuddle with him beneath an oak tree. 

Sirius pressed his forehead to Remus', some of his long curling hair falling forward and tickling Remus' cheek. "They'll have to chain me up in Azkaban to keep me from you, Remus Lupin," he said somberly.

Remus couldn't help laughing again, overjoyed, saying, "You can be so dramatic."

"Yes," Sirius agreed, and he kissed the tip of Remus' nose. "But I mean it."

"Well." Remus smiled, tiny and private, feeling safe and well and quite possibly normal. "Don't go getting yourself locked up, then, Padfoot."

Sirius reflected the smile, though with a mischievous twist to it. "Wouldn't dream of it, my dear Moony."

**Author's Note:**

> wtf @ past me for that end dialogue omfg...


End file.
